Never Say "Die"

http://www.livescience.com tells us that yes, chickens have lived as long as 18 months without their head. If some of the brain stem remains after -- ahem -- "harvesting", the bird still maintains some reflex function. Pardon me if you were eating in front of your PC. That is all.

Land of Head-Chopping Lives-up to Rep

Reuters is reporting that surgeons have reattached the sex member of a Saudi Arabian man after he tried to molest his Filipino maid one night earlier this month as his wife was sleeping. The maid -- who attacked him with a knife -- is in custody.

Lorena, is that you, Darlin'?

The Other War

The US didn't lose the Vietnam War in a classic military-sense; what we LOST was the will to militarily crush the commies. Thus, their win was not in southeast Asia, but rather on the streets of Chicago, LA, New York, etc. I strongly suspect that most Americans -- at least those born since around 1962 -- simply aren't aware of that distinction nearly as much as are many Islamists. Osama certainly understands it.

According to CENTCOM in Iraq, they captured some insightful Al-Qaida correspondence on April 16 and got the full translation accomplished by May 3. Some excerpts:

A glance at the reality of Baghdad in light of the latest events (sectarian turmoil)
1. It has been proven that the Shiites have a power and influence in Baghdad that cannot be taken lightly... During a military confrontation, they will be in a better position... Most of the mujahidin power lies in surprise attacks... explosive charges and booby traps. This is a different matter than a battle with organized forces that possess machinery and suitable communications networks... the Shiites are stronger in Baghdad and closer to controlling it while the mujahidin (who represent the backbone of the Sunni people) are not considered more than a daily annoyance to the Shiite government. The only power the mujahidin have is what they have already demonstrated in hunting down drifted patrols and taking sniper shots at those patrol members who stray far from their patrols, or planting booby traps among the citizens and hiding among them in the hope that the explosions will injure an American or members of the government....
2. ....most of the mujahidin groups in Baghdad are generally groups of assassin without any organized military capabilities.
3. ...a clear absence of organization among... brothers in Baghdad... Coordination among them is very difficult...
4. The policy followed by the brothers in Baghdad is a media oriented policy without a clear comprehensive plan to capture an area or an enemy center... strategy of their work is to show in the media that the American and the government do not control the situation... This policy dragged us to the type of operations that are attracted [attractive] to the media, and we go to the streets from time to time for more possible noisy operations... every year is worse than the previous year as far as the Mujahidin’s control and influence over Baghdad.
5. ...It has been proven... that the American investment in the [Islamic] Party and the [Islamic Scholars] Committee were not in vain... their media power is presented by their special radio and TV stations as the sole Sunni information source, coupled with our weak media which is confined mainly to the Internet, without a flyer or newspaper to present these events... their control of the majority of the speakers at mosques.... and present Islam in a sinful manner....

QUESTION: Based on what you have seen on TV or read in your local newspaper, is what you read above -- or the full translation in my LINK at the beginning -- your current perception of the situation in Iraq?

That's exactly why the "news" you see/read is never nearly as important as the info you are not provided. Remember that.

Fido's Plea

Oh Good Master of all creatures, great and small:

When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch -- or is going to be the same old story?

Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We dogs love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the Chrysler Eagle the Chrysler Beagle?

If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog?

When we get to the Pearly Gates do we have to shake hands to get in?

Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?

When I get to Heaven do I get my testicles back?

If you can see your way clear to answer these questions, I promise I'll never again:

Eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.
Munch on "leftovers" in the kitty litter box.
Treat the diaper pail as a cookie jar.
Assume the garbage collector is stealing our stuff.
Bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's license.
Play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.
Stick my nose into someone's crotch as a way of saying "hello".
Shake-off the rainwater AFTER entering the house.
Lick my crotch when company is over.

Amen

Not Us Yanks! Nosiree!

According to a survey of 2,000 adults by Royal Automobile Club Direct Insurance, British men who are lost wait about 20 minutes before asking for directions, while women only wait 10 minutes. Men endure about 10 minutes of nagging from the gals before stopping to ask. The survey also showed that 64 percent of couples admit to arguing over getting lost.

I'm so glad -- and proud, frankly -- that U.S. males aren't that bull-headed.

The Pandermeister

Democratic party chairman Howard Dean, in a speech to the American Jewish Committee last week, said:
I was recently asked about the difference between the Democratic and Republican parties. When it comes right down to it, the essential difference is that the Democrats fundamentally believe it is important to make sure that American Jews feel comfortable being American Jews.

The Faren Report has issued a standing offer of $1 US, genuine, to anyone who can clearly explain just WHAT THE HELL THIS NUT-JOB IS SAYING by that statement. "Just pandering" is not acceptable; I already took that one.

Lessons Unlearned

In a post on May 1 I mused about the egregious misappropriation of a quote to Thomas Jefferson. It seems one of the multitude who insist on perpetuating the myth (whom I didn't mention in that post) still hasn't learned from the past. Perhaps he doesn't read blogs -- which is his loss.

From a John "Mekong Warrior" Kerry speech yesterday:

Dismissing dissent is not only wrong, but dangerous when America’s leadership is unwilling to admit mistakes, unwilling to engage in honest discussion, and unwilling to hold itself accountable for the consequences of decisions made without genuine disclosure, or genuine debate. As Thomas Jefferson said, “dissent is the highest form of patriotism."

Sigh

Samurai Warrior News

CherryVale Mall (Indiana) security guards approached a 56-year-old man Friday afternoon after spotting him in front of a store with an 18-inch sheathed machete on his belt. Upon approaching the guy about the blade, he drew it and waved it in a threatening way, yelled obscenities and pushed one guard to the floor. The local cops came and disarmed him. He has been charged with aggravated assault and battery.
For a minute, there, I could have sworn......

I still miss this guy. What a waste.